In PA#3 you established a point of view
(a thesis) on a subject and divided your support of that point of view
into separate sub-arguments.
Note, for example, how Emily Poe does it
in the sample. She claims in her thesis statement that "vegetarianism
is clearly the better option for sustaining the Earth and all its
inhabitants." She divides her support of that claim into three
subtopics: environmental improvement, humane treatment of livestock, and
improved personal health.
Presumably, in a paragraph that follows,
she discusses the first of those sub-claims: That the vegetarian
lifestyle improves the environment.
Look back at the introductory paragraph
you wrote. Find your first sub-claim and write what would become the
second paragraph of your essay. Use the following paragraph pattern:
1. Topic sentence/ statement of the claim
2. Explanation of the claim (spend some time here)
3. Evidence by example and detail
4. Evidence by quotation
Use the templates in TSIS to indicate the moves you are making.
Upload the paragraph here as a
comment below by Thursday, 2/2 at 5 PM. Bring a hard copy to class on Friday. We'll be spending some
time in class making comments on each others' paragraphs, so don't forget the hard copy.
One of the reasons that innovation comes from determined people is because the fear of failure, and how long it takes to succeed. Inventions are not created after one trial. It takes many failures for success to happen. Failure causes most people to quit, but others are able to learn from failures and turn them into success over time. For example, it took Thomas Edison 1,000 tries to make the first lightbulb. One thousand times he failed, but he was able to stay determined for his desired outcome. Fortunately, Edison eventually was able to invent the first light bulb. When asked how it felt to fail 1,000 times he answered, “I didn’t fail 1,000 times. The light bulb was an invention with 1,000 steps.” This is why the mindset of accepting failure as a process is important for innovation.
ReplyDeleteErica VanHoose
ReplyDeleteProfessor Burns
Paragraph Assignment #4
2 February 2017
Subclaim: Improved Health
Going for a run is a great way to improve one’s health. Running can improve health by reducing the risk of cardiovascular disease, strengthening muscles and lungs, boosting the immune system and much more. A more specific health improvement involves the lungs. The more an individual runs, the stronger the lungs get. During a track practice, a parent and athlete shared a story on the development of the athlete’s asthma, which involves the lungs. They spoke about her running advancement from childhood through high school. As a child, she managed to run for short amounts of time and at a very slow pace, but as she got older her speed and running distance increased. The key point of this conversation was that as the athlete continued running daily, her lungs became stronger allowing her to run faster and longer. However, strength is not the only aspect of the lungs that improves. According to the Five Ways to Improve Your Overall Health Through Running article, “running will increase your heart rate, and by doing so, it will increase your lung function. This will increase the efficiency of your respiratory muscles allowing you to have healthy lungs...improving the lung volume.” In making this comment, the article urges us to get out and run as a way to help improve respiratory muscles, which in turn improves breathing abilities. As a result, runners gain stronger lungs allowing any activity to be done more efficiently. Therefore, running is just the first step towards a healthier life. If this is not enough motivation to start running, continue reading this essay to learn about the other benefits such as reduced stress.
Bibliography
"5 Ways To Improve Your Overall Health Through Running." Remedy By Nature. N.p., 1 Dec. 2016. Web. 02 Feb. 2017.
There are so many positive effects to working out. First I will start with aerobic activities, which could be running, swimming, hiking or just walking. Doing one hundred and fifty minutes of aerobic activities per week consistently can lower cholesterol, reduce the risk for type 2 diabetes, improve the immune function, and lower blood pressure. Not only does aerobic activities have health benefits but it also has a mental benefit when it comes to symptoms of depression and anxiety. According to PublicMed.gov “Regular aerobic exercise has significant cardiovascular benefits, including a reduction in incidence of and mortality from coronary artery disease--probably because of positive effects on blood lipid levels and blood pressure.” For the truth is aerobic exercise even has a correlation with a decreased morality rate when it comes to heart disease and heart related deaths. Therefore, doing the simplest activities now can help in the future, but doing more can help and prevent even more.
ReplyDeleteYou are probably thinking that I am trying to scare you when I say that making new friends is a hard thing to do. But the fact of the matter is that it is and here is why. People usually spend ten to twelve years in the same school seeing the same faces everyday and that is how you get acquainted with other people during that time. But when you come to college it’s completely a new crowd.. Not only that but college is a lot bigger than high school. This is problematic because you don’t get used to seeing the same people again and again as everyone is scattered all over the campus. This also eliminates the idea of you finding people like you since people aren’t concentrated in one single area and are somewhere else. Another problem that arises is that everyone has different classes during different times and each semester these classes change. So even when you kind of start getting used to seeing familiar faces the semester ends and next semester you are in a different class with different people. For example when I came to the university I took up computer science. And after a month or two I started to talk to a few people in my class. However, the semester ended and in the next semester when I took up an advance course in CS I discovered that the people who were with me in the previous class had changed their major and were now doing something else. And when I bumped into a few of them and said, “Hey how’s it going?” they replied by saying “Good”, and then just went along to join their new group of friends.-Taimur Iftikhar
ReplyDeleteA trait gained in playing youth football that will later on benefit players is work ethic. Work ethic is a vital trait to success is this world and without it, it is hard to accomplish anything worth wild. When you’re tired and do not want to practice but do anyway, that is work ethic. When kids run a play over and over again until its perfect, that shows work ethic. It is embedded in the players, as soon as they take their first step on the field, that in football, nothing will be given and you must earn everything. This trait sticks with players the rest of their lives. In life nothing is handed out and sometimes you suffer defeat, just like in football, but it is the work ethic that will help with recovery and success the next time around. As Vince Lombardi once said, “football is like life - it requires perseverance, self-denial, hard work, sacrifice, dedication and respect for authority.” This quote from one of the greats shows how football and life are one, and the skills you learn in football will translate into skills for later in life.
ReplyDeleteOne reason College athletes shouldn’t get paid for playing their sport, is the universities can’t afford to pay every athlete. Universities are already giving many student athletes scholarships to attend their school, and there’s only so many of them they can give away. If student athletes also want to get paid for playing, then the university would have to make cutbacks on scholarships or other departments, because they don’t have enough money to do all of those things. In 2015 Auburn built an 11,000 square feet big screen in their football stadium, that cost them $13.9 million dollars. Many people thought that since they could pay that money for a big screen, that they could pay athletes as well. However, this was not the case. Jay Jacobs Auburns athletic director, said “the big screen investment, was a hail mary pass to try to bring more money into the program.” It’s hard for Universities to pay student athletes even more money than they’re already given, when the University itself is struggling to make a profit. This is one reason why College athletes shouldn’t get paid to play sports.
ReplyDeleteIn order to be a student athlete in college you must be in great shape and be willing to work, no matter what division your school is. The reason why playing a sport in college is such a commitment is because it demands so much of your time while you're in and out of the season. According to the NCAA rulebook, teams are allowed up to 4 hours of practice a day, and 20 hours of practice a week. Since this in a NCAA rule, this goes for all of the divisions. Here at OWU, which is a division three school, all of the athletic coaches take strength and condition very seriously. Speaking for the lacrosse team, our coach demands that we are in great shape. We have 6:30 AM lifts and runs twice a week, and practice for two hours every day of the week except Sunday. All of is work takes a toll on your body, but it's required if you want to a be a successful student athlete.
ReplyDeleteOne reason why animal testing is not effective is because animal tests do not reliably predict results in humans. While there are a few select animal tests that have been proven to accurately predict results in clinical trials the majority have been shown to fail. The reason for such a high rate of failure is due to the fact that while humans are like other animals in many ways not one animal will react exactly the same way to a drug or treatment as a human would. Aysha Akhtar, a neurologist at Cambridge, says “Animal models specifically, and animal experimentation generally, are inadequate bases for predicting clinical outcomes in human beings in the great bulk of biomedical science”. Akhtar then gives two examples of failed clinical tests, “Over 85 HIV vaccines failed in clinical trials despite working in non-human primates, and over 100 stroke drugs that were effective when tested on animals but failed in humans”. These are just a few experiments showing how animal tests do not reliably predict results in humans.
ReplyDeleteOne of the easiest ways budding environmentalists can help reduce both air and water pollution is to limit their use of plastic. Plastic is not biodegradable and when plastic is placed in landfills harmful chemicals can spread into groundwater, contaminating it. Many plastics are created from fossil fuels, which release harmful emissions into the air when extracted. An easy and cheap way to reduce plastic waste is to use a reusable water bottles. This option is both wallet friendly and environmentally friendly. Buying a reusable water bottle is a cheap one time purchase that goes a long way to help the environment. According to 2006 estimates by the Pacific Institute, “Bottling water produced more than 2.5 million tons of carbon dioxide.” Releasing carbon dioxide into the air is extremely detrimental to the environment by trapping heat into the atmosphere. Thus, even if people only in America switched to reusable water bottles, millions of tons of carbon dioxide and plastic would not find its way into the environment.
ReplyDeleteBibliography:
"Bottled Water and Energy Fact Sheet." Pacific Institute. N.p., n.d. Web. 02 Feb. 2017.
People always see football players hit each other at high speeds which concerns people due to brain damage, but little do people know soccer causes just as many concussions as football does. When watching soccer the audience sees players hit the ball off their heads. People don't realize how hard the ball is kicked and how much force the ball will hit the head of a player. Briana Scurry a professional women's soccer player for the United States team suffered a concussion in 2010 and had to get surgery in 2013. The surgeons pulled a pea size ball of damaged tissue out of her head. This is only one example of how football is not the only violent sport that can cause concussions.
ReplyDeleteOne attribute that football teaches an athlete to have is a good work ethic. Work ethic is a trait that will help you succeed in anything you do in life. When your doing work that is hard and stressful but no matter what you will do your best and get the job done, that is your work ethic in play. You learn what having a good work ethic is during summer football camp. This is where you wake up at seven in the morning, have two practices, two film sessions, and weightlifting all in a single day. Then after your body and mind are exhausted you have to wake up and do it all over again. As legendary NFL coach Vince Lombardi once said, "Practice does not make perfect. Only perfect practice makes perfect". This quote shows shows that just showing up doesn't mean you have good work ethic you must work to be perfect to have good work ethic.
ReplyDeleteSudden change in the tone when it’s extremely dark always lead to something occurring. The type of music that is played in horror movies makes a big difference because it can manipulate different moods of scenes and how you react to them. When watching a scary movie, I wouldn’t expect to hear music that sounds pleasing, which than give me a pleasing feeling. However, I would want to hear music that is electrifying to the ears that make me tense up and almost curl up in a ball like a baby such as a sound like “boom. ” For instance, I know when I watched Hush, ten minutes into the film there were sounds that had me feeling very depressed, which led to a setup. The music that had me in a “depressed” mood was then followed by music that was suspenseful. The director specifically does things in that order because he wants to control his audience, to be so called “scared”. I recall a character from the movie walking in her house not to mention as she is walking in her house the male stalker was following her. As that scene went on the music began to play a role that controlled many thoughts on what would happen next.
ReplyDeleteOne of the reasons why students in college should consider competing in athletics is because it establishes good relationships with your peers. Building strong relationships and friendships with your peers are very important as not only you are trying to reach a specific goal together, but these peers will always be around to help you. Your teammates will be some of the most important people in your day to day life as a student, some of these students will become some of your closest friends in college as you spend hours on end together. It has been found that students who make friends in their sports have been found to stay friends even off the playing field. “One of the greatest feelings in sports is getting to hang out with friends, share the experience of working hard and competing together against others.” This is just a prime example of how friendships are being created through the competing of athletics.
ReplyDeleteThe benefits of caffeine, provided measures are taken to prevent an increase in tolerance, include moderate increases in physical and mental function. Many people are aware that the stimulant acts as a strong “pick me up”, helping both athletes and office workers stay focused and alert. These positive impacts are described well in the peer reviewed study, “A review of caffeine’s effects on cognitive, physical and occupational performance” by McLellan, Caldwell, and Lieberman. The study abstract states that “following low to moderate caffeine doses, alertness, vigilance, attention, reaction time and attention improve”. This illustrates the positive benefits of caffeine on various aspects of your mental function. The study also explains the positive physical benefits, as “Effects on physical performance on a vast array of physical performance metrics… are evident on doses that exceed about 200mg”. Generally, caffeine can have positive impacts on both short term physical and mental performance.
ReplyDeletehttp://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0149763416300690
Art education has been shown to benefit other aspects of students careers. The arts improve mental health, motivation, and performance by engaging students in a way that other subjects just can not compete. According to the Arts Education Partnership, scores in subjects such as math and English are improved with an arts education. As well as expanding critical thinking skills, the AEP also states that arts education “A positive climate and culture in school.” Likewise, these same ideas can correlate to careers past college.
ReplyDelete